So this has been, for the most part an uneventful week. This is a good thing, compared to life lately.
On Wednesday, Steve insisted on going back to work, as he is feeling a lot better. Malachy has been chugging along at a good pace with his studies. Yesterday, Veteran's Day, was a school vacation day, however we pushed a little further in History and Art, as those were the two subjects that were lagging a bit in progress. Things were going along just fine, UNTIL.....
this morning's dance class. Since our first meltdown back in late August (with attending the gym's daycare) and my advising him that he'd be going back to his neighborhood school if he continued to give me a hard time about going, things have gone surprisingly well there. Despite the fact that most of the children that attend the daycare are babies and toddlers, he has actually met a few kids around his age that come regularly. One boy's name is Roman and they are usually together for the Friday morning dance class. There have been no issues for weeks, until today.
Into the daycare, walk two brothers, age 8 and 4, complete with bad attitudes. Malachy and Roman had been playing in a corner of the daycare, pretending to be characters from the video game, "Donkey Kong". Bad boy #1 asked them what game they were playing, to which Malachy replied "Donkey Kong". Bad boy #2, laughed at them and told them that was a stupid game and that's when the trouble began. Bad boy #2 continued to call them babies and other names and pretended to throw things at them. Meanwhile, the daycare teacher has a baby in her arms and a toddler hanging onto her leg. Malachy got really upset then, too upset actually, and went to the daycare teacher and angrily told her to put the two boys in time out. And of course, she wasn't taking orders from an 8 year old at that time, and just told them all to behave. Bad boy #1 continued to tease the other two, which caused Malachy to show his gorilla side and went off on him, screaming. At this point, the front desk attendant interrupted my dance class and pulled me out to tell me I was wanted in the daycare. Oh yippee! I walk over and there is Malachy crying, his face as red as a beet and he yelled to me as I was just opening the door to go in, "These boys are teasing me and I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!!". I asked the teacher what was going on and she replied with a question, "Does he have a bit of a bad temper?". Thrown off balance by not really knowing what was going on, I gathered my things, grabbed my boy and we went home.
I calmed him down and after hearing his side of the story, I realized he is 1)overly sensitive , 2) overreacting, 3) not equipped with the right things to say or do when teased. I've seen this happen with him before. The truth is, I know where he gets this from.
Growing up, we were never allowed to talk back, never allowed to get into a confrontation, or to ever question authority. Pretty much, I was a very submissive little girl that grew into a compliant young lady, always bending over backwards to please. Its only in my forties that I have had the courage to stand up for myself with others. I don't want this for my boy. I want him to have a back-bone and stand up to bullies, or have thicker skin so they don't even begin to bother him. I can't always be with him (although lately it seems this is the deal), he needs the right skills to do this for himself. So over the coming weekend, I am going to research ways on how to deal with bullies. I figure we'll do some role playing and hopefully, he'll learn that he can protect himself in ways without blowing a gasket and/or getting in trouble with those in authority.
And maybe I'll learn a thing or two too. So look out, bullies! HERE WE COME!
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